A day in the life of Rona Ambrose

9:00 a.m.: When asked if unusually mild temperatures are due to global warming, dismisses idea but blames “witchcraft.”

10:00 a.m.: Stands in the middle of dozens of smokestacks enjoying the “pollution-free air.”

10:05 a.m.: When offered a cigarette declines, stating “I don’t want to breathe in that crap.”

11:00 a.m.: Wonders if can get Minister of Transportation to outlaw public transportation.

11:30 a.m.: Makes sure ronaambrose.com still states her title as “Minister of the Environment” (As of Jan. 9th it still did). Critics point out she has trouble being recycled.

1:00 p.m.: Wonders how to further denigrate Canada’s image on the international scene as Minister of Intergovernmental Affairs.

1:30 p.m.: Daydreams that as Minister of Defence, would withdraw membership from United Nations, stating “Canada cannot meet UN targets, nor can it meet membership requirements.” Critics quick to point out that sole requirement for membership is simply to exist.

2:00 p.m.: Advises Environment Minister incumbent John Baird to “Never give up your blood to be tested for toxins.”

3:00 p.m.: Calls up Stephen Harper, asks if could be named Minister of Francophonie. Francophones everywhere experience a sudden chill.

Rona Ambrose: voting record

Riding: Edmonton-Spruce Grove, Alberta
Party: Conservative

2005.06.28 Same-sex Marriage (An Act respecting certain aspects of legal capacity for marriage for civil purposes): Nay

2005.03.23 Sponsorship of a relative for immigration purposes (An Act to amend the immigration and Refugee Protection Act): Nay

2004.11.02 Marijuana (An Act to amend the Contraventions Act and the Controlled Drugs and Substances Act and to make consequential amendments to other Acts): Nay

2004.10.18 Whistleblower protection and procedure (An Act to establish a procedure for the disclosure of wrongdoings in the public sector, including the protection of persons who disclose the wrongdoings): Nay

For more info on your Member of Parliament:
www.howdtheyvote.ca

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