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Breaking up with Scarlett Johansson

by Archives September 22, 2009

For a lot of artists, changing medium can be refreshing and allow forays into fun, yet usually less serious, projects. A good example being Andy Warhol’s move into the music industry, doing production for the Velvet Underground. Sadly, this trend has lately taken a turn for the worse.
Earlier this month, Scarlett Johansson collaborated with Pete Yorn to release Break Up; from this one can only assume that she has yet to listen to her first album.
Monotone and just plain boring, Johansson is unable to be saved by her legendary collaborator, who presumably took the project on as a friendly favour rather than a serious endeavour.
Johansson appears to be among the Hollywood elite who believe that box-office success equates artistic ability.
This, however, is not the case.
Perhaps it would behove the young starlet to understand that if she is to consider changing her career she should make sure she is decent in her former. In fact, Johansson applied to New York University’s Tisch School of Arts in 2003 and was rejected. Was that enough to squash her ambitions? Hardly. Before this recent release, Johansson let loose a Tom Waits tribute album, Anywhere I Lay My Head, to negative reviews. She also recorded a version of Jeff Buckley’s “Last Goodbye,” for the film He’s Just Not That Into You. And that is where the line is truly drawn.
If Johansson were to release mediocre pop, like that of Paris Hilton, it could simply be shrugged off as a poor attempt by an untalented celebrity who seems to have just been having some fun. But Johansson believes it is within her abilities to cover the likes of Tom Waits and perhaps one of the best male vocalists of our age, Jeff Buckley. To record covers of these legends’ songs is to associate herself with their abilities, which is insulting – to them and to me.
If Johansson wishes to cross over again, she should follow in the steps of other lacklustre actresses and slap her name on a bottle of perfume and some corny jewelry.

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