Zombie apocalypse survival kit

Photo by Mallika Guhan

With Halloween around the corner, so was a mass of zombies at the annual Montreal Zombie Walk. To my astonishment, and as if straight out of a movie, the military happened to be running an exercise out of the Old Port at the same time as the Zombie Walk. Soldiers dressed in full combat gear with assault rifles drove by on trucks as zombies marched through the streets; it would have been a perfect coincidental miracle had the zombies been real. The resulting massacre would have been magnificent as zombies were mowed down in a glorious hail of gunfire.

Unfortunately, the zombies were just people in makeup and costume with a fascination for the undead. However, this left me thinking, am I prepared for a zombie apocalypse? I have compiled the ultimate list for zombie hunting, which may come in handy should you find yourself one day shooting your way out of the city.


Hunting and Survival Equipment:

– M16 Assault rifle: the perfect weapon for close encounters with our flesh eating friends as well as an excellent choice for long range headshots!

– Crossbow: like an assault rifle, a crow bow provides one with the firepower necessary to take out zombies yet allows for silent kills thereby not attracting any other of our dead friends.

–  Katana Samurai Sword: if this season of the Walking Dead taught me anything about zombie survival, it’s that a samurai sword is not just bad ass but highly effective when it comes to beheading zombies.

– Full suit of medieval knight armour with a chainmail neck: post apocalyptic fashion statement? Maybe but I’ll have the last laugh when I can walk and or dance through a crowd of the walking dead without worrying about my brains being eaten and my limbs being slowly torn from my torso!

-Hummer H3: perfect for driving through crowds of the dead or a scenic drive towards the country where you can set up a compound, and rule as supreme leader.

-Water and cans of food: Hunting equipment won’t do you any good if you’re dying of dehydration and starvation.

-Zippo lighters: use to keep warm, not to put attention on yourself.

-Flashlight: not need for explanation

-First aid kit and field surgical set: if someone is bitten, don’t bother, immediately chop head off.


Good luck!

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