Tag: David Easey

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What it really feels like to take antidepressants

Photo by David Easey

Why I decided to start taking prescription medication to treat my depression and anxiety

The sun rises over the sleepy city, and I’ve already been up for several hours, lying in bed having an early morning existential crisis—the usual. The winter semester has just ended, and instead of feeling relaxed and elated, I feel tense, exhausted and utterly tortured.

My entire body is extremely bloated, and I struggle to find the energy to get out of bed. My skin itches and burns all over, and my jaw is locked shut from fiercely clenching it throughout the long, arduous night.

The last few months of university had proven to be extremely challenging for me. I could barely manage to stay afloat. I defied all deadlines for my schoolwork, pulling crazy stunts—like handing in a research project nine days late—and constantly asking for extensions. I also struggled to produce my opinions section for The Concordian on a weekly basis, and felt that I didn’t deserve my editorial position. I saw myself as an imposter hiding amongst a bevy of accomplished and ambitious journalists.

The pressure felt overwhelming, and the cracks in my life were becoming fissures.

Over time, everything became complicated and difficult, and my emotions went into overdrive. Even writing—my one true passion—became almost impossible. I was barely able to type out a single word. Staring at the blank screen, I felt infuriated and cursed.

I entered a period of self-imposed exile, where I withdrew from society—only speaking to a handful of close confidants. Everyone knew something was wrong and urged me to speak to a medical professional.

Almost a week later, I found myself in the doctor’s office, feeling like a wounded animal. I spoke with my family doctor for almost 45 minutes, and we filled out a survey together that asked general questions regarding mood, behaviour and appetite. By the end of the appointment, he concluded that I was suffering from severe anxiety and depression, and sent me off with a prescription in tow.

The news hit me like a ton of bricks. I’ve always been an anxious person, but I’d always kept it under control. I was too naïve to realize that all these struggles could be related to mental illness. And now I’d be taking medication that would alter my brain chemistry?

Well, it turns out, 20 per cent of people in this country will experience some manifestation of mental illness at some point in their life, according to the Canadian Mental Health Association. It’s a lot more common than we think. In an article published in MacLean’s in 2009, Lev Bukhman, the executive director of a student insurance program, revealed that antidepressants were the number one drug purchased by students.

Graphic by Patricia Petit Liang

“Mental health issues are one of the biggest challenges facing students today,” Bukhman said in the same report, highlighting that many students become susceptible during their time at a postsecondary institution.

Citalopram—the drug I was prescribed—is an antidepressant from a class of drugs known as selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRI). They are commonly used to treat both depression and anxiety, since they increase the amount of serotonin in the brain, according to Mayo Clinic—a renowned medical nonprofit based out of the U.S.

As one can imagine, I was incredibly anxious and cynical about taking these pills. The fear of losing my artistic abilities and personality were my main concerns, and I desperately loathed the idea of turning into a mindless buffoon pumped full of sedatives.

After doing a lot of research, I decided to take the plunge and swallow the first pill. Expecting to feel an immediate sense of euphoria, I was disappointed to discover that I didn’t feel any different. Everyone kept saying that I’d only begin to see a change in four to six weeks, but I didn’t want to wait.

All hope seemed lost, and I felt once again lost at sea. Was this what rock bottom felt like?

Small victories were made, though—one afternoon I found the will to find a new therapist. My old one had been a vapid creature with frazzled baby hairs and a medieval approach to mental health.

New research indicates that the most effective treatment for depression is a combination of both therapy and medication, according to research published in JAMA Psychiatry in 2014. This study followed 452 depressed individuals—some were given medication, while others were given medication in conjunction with cognitive therapy. The findings showed that the latter group fared far better, and their symptoms improved faster compared to their counterparts only taking medication.

Things gradually improved—albeit at a snail’s pace — and I began to notice tiny changes. I was able to get more than four hours of sleep each night, and on certain days, I successfully made it to the gym. My body returned to a normal state as I regained my appetite and the scars from those nasty rashes began to heal.

A huge debate continues to rage around the topic of antidepressants, with many diminishing the reality of mental illness, stating that they shouldn’t be treated with drugs. Giles Fraser, a journalist for The Guardian, wrote in his weekly column: “Happiness can be reclaimed by doing a bit more exercise or being more sociable. This sounds healthier than pills.”

I’m not saying antidepressants are for everyone, but I can definitely say they helped me tremendously. Although the process was painstakingly slow, my chutzpah has returned, and the very fact that I’m writing this article is a testament to the fact that you can recover from anxiety and depression.

[Resources] 

  • Visit the offices of Counselling and Psychological Services on campus at H-440 (SGW) or AD 103 (Loyola) to request to see a counsellor. You can reach them at 514-848-2424 ext. 3545 (SGW) or at ext. 3555 (Loyola).
  • Visit a nurse at Health Services on campus at 1550 De Maisonneuve W. Room GM-200 (SGW) or AD 131 (Loyola). You can reach them at 514-848-2424 ext. 3565 (SGW) or at ext. 3575 (Loyola).
  • Visit the Centre for Gender Advocacy at the SGW campus for support at 2110 Mackay St. between Monday and Friday from 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. or at (514) 848-2424 ext. 7431. For peer support call (514) 848-2424 ext. 7880.
  • If you are in immediate danger on campus, call 911 or security at (514) 848-3717—option one.
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Persistent homophobia plagues the city

Artwork by Torbak Hopper

Why it’s still not safe for same-sex couples in Montreal

The streets were filled with people from all walks of life as they waved their rainbow flags on a balmy Sunday afternoon. The city of Montreal had gathered along a long stretch of the downtown core to celebrate the annual Pride parade.

The environment felt safe and welcoming, with politicians, companies, and LGBT+ organizations marching to commemorate the struggles the community has endured over the last fifty years. It was a rare opportunity to see many couples from the community embracing one another in broad daylight. Although we live in Montreal, one of the most accepting and diverse cities in North America, there are still instances of homophobia that occur every year.

I find it extremely rare to see same-sex couples showing signs of affection in public in Montreal. I think this is because many couples still encounter homophobia on a daily basis, and are thus afraid to express their love publicly.

This past spring, a same-sex couple reported to the police that they had been physically assaulted at Chez Francoise, a bar in Hochelaga-Maisonneuve, according to the CBC. There were multiple assailants and the couple was also subjected to a volley of cruel and derogatory insults. A kiss-in—a symbolic act of protest where LGBT+ couples gathered to embrace and display affection out in the open—took place a few days later in Hochelaga-Maisonneuve. It was extremely symbolic in itself because it was seen as a radical sign of protest that challenged the lack of PDA seen on our streets. The event shed light on the fact these incidents still do, in fact, occur.

A few months ago, I was on the metro travelling with my partner at the time. As he reached out to hold my hand, I immediately felt the atmosphere in the metro car become hostile and uncomfortable. People began to stare and analyze, as if we were a rarely-seen species that they’ve never encountered. Perhaps I was overanalyzing the situation, but I can’t deny that in that moment, I definitely felt more vulnerable to an attack.

I decided to discuss this issue with one of my closest friends, Danielle—who’s in a long-term, same-sex relationship. To my horror, she told me that she often encounters homophobia and vicious catcalling by men on the street. It happened just the other day when she was holding hands with her girlfriend in the old port, and men constantly invaded their personal space and attempted to probe them with inappropriate questions and comments about the nature of their relationship.

Thankfully, there are safe spaces in many establishments and communities where same-sex couples feel comfortable enough to express their love for one another. It deeply saddens me that homophobia still exists in this day and age, and as a society, we definitely have our work cut out for us. Love is love, and the general population needs to become desensitized to this completely normal expression of it.

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The forgotten genocide of the 20th century

The bitter smell of Armenian coffee—otherwise known as soorj—fills the house as I stare at an old photograph of my late grandfather whilst sipping on this cultural delight. The black and white picture is brittle and cracked, and it continuously endures the test of time, serving as a critical reminder that my grandfather worked tirelessly to bring his family to Canada.

He lived in a very different world compared to mine. His world was filled with instability, violence and bloodshed, as his family members were survivors of the 1915 Armenian genocide. It was a dark moment in history, and an even darker fissure in Turkish society.

Yet Turkey still denies the genocide ever took place, with the government in Ankara insisting the systematic annihilation of 1.5 million Armenian ethnics was simply a casualty of war, according to The New York Times. As a descendant of these survivors, I find this policy extremely offensive; it highlights Turkey’s backwardness and refusal to come to terms with its bloody past.

My connection to the genocide begins with my grandfather’s family, who hailed from a Turkish city called Iskenderun, situated by the Mediterranean. This city once housed a large and vibrant Armenian community, as did many others within the Ottoman Empire.

This all changed rapidly in 1915 when a radical political party called The Young Turks obtained power. The Young Turks saw the Armenian minority as a threat and also as a scapegoat, since the Ottomans had allied with Germany in WWI, and were losing the war at this point—especially on the Russian front. This led to a campaign of mass murders, arrests and deportation of ethnic Armenians, according to the United Nations.

This meant that my grandfather’s family was deported out of Iskenderun in 1915—before my grandfather was born—forced to march through the Syrian Desert in the harshest of conditions with barely any water, food or shelter. Hundreds of thousands would eventually die from exhaustion, starvation, dehydration and exposure, with marauding bandits also allowed to raid, rape and pillage Armenians as they marched onwards.

Two of my great-grandmother’s daughters were kidnapped during this period, never to be seen again. My ancestor’s house and possessions were confiscated and looted by locals and those in power.

A few family members survived this death march and made it to Deir al-Zour in the heart of the Syrian Desert. My grandfather was born sometime later without a birth certificate or any official papers. They were refugees, trying to find stability in a world that sought to murder them.

In 1985, the United Nations officially recognized the events of 1915-1917 against the Armenians, stating in the UN report on genocide that “evidence of that massacre has been provided in numerous diplomatic documents of the various countries, including Germany, which had been Turkey’s ally during the First World War.”

More than 25 countries including France, Canada and Russia recognize the events of 1915-1917 as genocide against the Armenian people, according to the CBC.

However, Turkish President Recep Tayyip Erdogan still adamantly denies a genocide took place. In a 2010 interview with CNN, Erdogan said, “no nation, no people has the right to impose the way it remembers history [onto] another nation of people.” He said in the same interview “no one should expect this of Turkey,” when questioned about labeling the violence as ‘genocide.’

This statement from the Turkish leader is a slap in the face to all Armenians around the world, and demonstrates the sheer lack of respect Erdogan has towards the living descendants of genocide survivors.

It’s bad enough that the perpetrators of the genocide were never tried for their crimes against humanity in an international court, or even in a Turkish court for that matter. In fact many of the collaborators went on to serve in the next government led by Kemal Ataturk, according to professor Frank Chalk, cofounder of the Montreal Institute for Genocide and Human Rights Studies. But to have a government policy that denies the systematic murder of more than a million people seems downright blasphemous.

Even prominent members of Turkish society have spoken out, admitting that there was indeed a genocide, only to be silenced by the government.

Orhan Pamuk, a famous novelist from Istanbul spoke out in 2005 to a Swiss newspaper, saying the murder of the Armenians was undeniable, according to BBC News. Following his comments, Pamuk was branded a traitor by the government and he was charged in Istanbul with ‘public denigration of Turkish identity’ according to The Guardian, with a prison sentence of up to three years. The charges were eventually dropped, but serves as a reminder that freedom of speech is hard to come by in the Turkish Republic.

“There is a debate in Turkish society today about which policy to follow in the future,” said Chalk, before adding that “the number of Turkish academics, intellectuals, and lawyers arguing in favor of acknowledging the Armenian Genocide is growing every year.”

Although the path to justice is far from over, the most important aspect here is to remember the genocide. To remember the people who did not get to live in a peaceful country, attend university, or live full lives. To pay homage to the 1.5 million people who were systematically targeted and murdered for belonging to a group, which included my ancestors, my family, and countless other families.

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The flavourless flavour of business school

Photos by Marie-Pierre Savard.

Why you should think twice before attending JMSB

I pass through the heavy glass doors and feel the immediate urge to shed my identity and kowtow to the corporate overlords. I start speaking in a strange vernacular where I use the words ‘cash flow,’ and ‘capital,’ as dark visions of materialism and greed fill my mind.

Photos by Marie-Pierre Savard.

I observe my surroundings and see that everyone looks the same, adhering to a certain aesthetic. Their business uniform seems to be bought from Zara, as they reek of expensive perfumes and Gillette razors. Their phones constantly illuminate with LinkedIn notifications, while each student is constantly trying to think of something witty to write on the CASA-JMSB Facebook group (it’s essentially filled with memes).

This is my perception of John Molson School of Business, and after spending nearly two years at the prestigious institution, I can definitely say the environment was sterile, conformist and vapid.

I’ll never forget the day I received my acceptance letter to JMSB; it was comparable to when Harry discovered he was going to Hogwarts. Excitement filled my hollow soul as I naively imagined my new life as a business student.

Photos by Marie-Pierre Savard.

I should admit that I never truly wanted to study business, and I agonized to choose between the arts and business for months leading up to my acceptance. I knew that I always wanted to study history, but my parents kept telling me I’d be a poor arts student with no prospects after graduation.

One of my first memories in JMSB was in a class called business communications (the course was a complete sham). I remember the professor was giving the class advice on how to make your peers look stupid in a group interview setting. Initially shocked at this apparent ruthlessness, I turned to the girl next to me and shared my disbelief, to which she harshly replied, “business is not some fairytale, David.”

I also remember all of my professors telling me that I had to wear formal business wear for all presentations—which proved to be extremely uncomfortable. As someone who’s used to wearing muted all-black ensembles with bedhead hair, I felt like I was constantly being told to relinquish my identity and conform to the standards of the school. I even showed up to one presentation dressed in my everyday clothes and lost marks because I didn’t “obey.”

Photos by Marie-Pierre Savard.

To make matters worse, I despised all of my courses because they were so bland, and there was absolutely no opportunity to express any creativity whatsoever. Even when it came down to PowerPoint presentations, we weren’t allowed to push the boundaries without fearing academic consequences. My creativity suffered immensely during this period, as I suddenly felt like I wasn’t able to express myself properly. I began to experience a lot of anxiety due to this constant repression.

I’ll never forget the countless hours I spent memorizing volumes of statistics, accounting tables and business theories, just to regurgitate them on exams like a mindless robot. I was in pure hell.

I cannot deny that my grades suffered during this period, simply because I was stuck in an insipid environment that I grew to despise. I finally took the plunge after 18 months and switched to my true passion—the arts. Although I felt like I was giving up an opportunity to make money in the future, I knew I was better suited going down this path.

 

Business is not for everyone and it certainly wasn’t for me. I know I’m not alone in sharing these sentiments, so The Concordian conducted interviews with JMSB students to see what they thought. Check out the video below.

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The industrious demise of the Canadian landscape

Photo by Kris Krug.

The tar sands are a toxic wasteland that shall poison our nation

“In short, it is an enterprise of epic proportions, akin to the building of the pyramids or China’s Great Wall. Only bigger,” said former prime minister Stephen Harper back in 2006, as he vividly discussed the development of the tar sands.

Photo by Kris Krug.

It’s now almost a decade later, and the surrounding forest is disappearing, as the process of industrialization has spread like a deadly virus. The animals are diseased and the river has been exposed to toxic pollutants. The air now carries a pungent odor, as noxious fumes fill the atmosphere and plumes of vapor block out the sun.

The thirst for oil has undoubtedly transformed the landscape of northern Alberta. As a Canadian, I strongly oppose the development of the tar sands and I’m quite frankly ashamed we have allowed these nefarious operations to continue onwards.

You may be wondering ‘What the hell are these so called tar sands?,’ sometimes referred to as ‘oil sands.’ According to the Canadian Association of Petroleum Producers, Alberta has some of the largest deposits of bitumen, a type of crude oil that is trapped within the sandy soil. Bitumen is a gooey substance that shares a similar texture to molasses, and requires various chemical processes to separate the oil from the sand—hence the name tar sands.

Photo by Julia Kilpatrick.

According to an article published by The Globe and Mail in 2014, the size of the tar sands is 140,000 square kilometers, and only 4,750 square kilometers are mineable. The development can now be seen from space, as parts of the boreal forest have been decimated due to operations in the region, as mentioned in the same article. Most of the extracted oil is consumed domestically, with 1.5 million barrels consumed per day, while the rest of the oil heads mainly to the U.S., according to the same article.

This data highlights our grotesque addiction to oil.  

The development has heavily impacted the indigenous communities living around the Athabasca River. An article published by the Vancouver Observer revealed that Health Canada warned several communities living downstream of the tar sands that there were toxins present in the animals. Testing revealed that fish contained abnormally high levels of mercury, meanwhile wild game contained high levels of arsenic. This inevitably led several communities to stop eating wild game, forcibly altering their traditional way of life. The same article also mentioned how many community members have developed rare forms of cancer, leading many in the community to speculate there exists a link between the tar sands and these diseases.

Immediately after the article was released, the then Health Minister Rona Ambrose refused to comment on the matter. In my opinion, this demonstrates the level of devotion the Conservatives had towards the development of the tar sands. Throughout Harper’s dark reign over our country, he notoriously endorsed the Keystone pipeline proposal that would see millions of litres of crude oil transferred across the border.

We have yet to see the true consequences of the tar sands here in Canada, although for reference we can look towards the incident regarding the Kalamazoo River. In 2010, a Canadian pipeline carrying diluted bitumen spilled into the tributaries of the Kalamazoo River in Michigan. Over the course of 17 hours, roughly 3.3 million litres of crude spilled from the pipeline, before the company Enbridge shut off the flow, according to the CBC.

Photo by David Dodge.

The diluted bitumen behaves very differently from refined oil, and sinks in water, making cleanup efforts extremely difficult, according to the same report. The entire spill costs almost US$1.27 billion according to EcoWatch, meaning that it was the most expensive inland oil spill in U.S. history.

With the new Liberal government coming into power, it is unclear which path they shall take in addressing this very contentious issue. Catherine McKenna, the Minister of Environment and Climate Change, was in Paris for the climate talks, but hasn’t publicly addressed the government’s policy towards the tar sands.

Can we not learn from these horrible mistakes? Can we not see the tar sands spell disaster in capital letters written bold? The region has become a toxic blemish on our beautiful landscape, altering the ecosystem and indigenous communities’ way of life. Our nation may be filled with desirable resources, ready to be exploited, but at what cost?

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Concordia: the cash cow

Photo courtesy of Creative Commons Finance Images

Dealing with a deceitful and dishonest university

As I scurry through the winding stairwell in the Hall building, I try to understand the actions of my university. How could someone be paid a six-figure salary for less than three months of work?

Anger, disbelief and sheer mistrust soon fill my mind; I begin to fume while slowly sipping a stale black coffee.

Photo courtesy of Creative Commons Finance Images

This all stems from an article released last week by La Presse that detailed the payout of the former CFO of Concordia. The publication revealed that the university paid Sonia Trudel a grand sum of $235,000 for working less than 70 days.

Trudel was first hired at the end of August 2015 as an advisor, and soon became the CFO a month later according to The Gazette.

She parted ways ‘mutually’ with the university in late November according to a university press release.

The bureaucrats are clearly bathing in gold, while we peasants can barely pay our tuition. Why was this woman paid so much money, especially during tough financial times?

Last year, many students took to the streets to denounce the Couillard regime and the budget cuts to the education sector—myself included.

These austerity cuts were to drastically impact the quality of education at Concordia and the services we receive.

Documents from the CSU’s website say that the university is expected to run an $8.2 million budget this year alone. The symptoms of austerity have already taken effect, and include larger class sizes, fewer resources available to students and fewer courses offered.

Many professors no longer have any teaching assistants simply because the university can no longer afford to pay them, yet we somehow paid Madame Trudel a small fortune.

I have lost all hope for this school.

The lack of transparency at the hands of these senior bureaucrats makes me absolutely sick. The ivory towers has failed us and it is time we take matters into our own hands.

Considering we students pay these corporate overlords in the form of our tuition, I demand we see their salaries and begin an era of open honesty. If the school is suffering and facing cuts, why should the oligarchs receive a six-figure salary?

 

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Money, Money, Money (and maybe some football)

Photo courtesy of Creative Commons Finance Images

The Super Bowl is just a lame excuse for capitalism to flourish

The air reeks of fried foods, cheap cologne and fermented ale.

The room is filled with muscled bros zealously watching the television, as if their lives depend on the outcome of this game. Their few female companions at the bar look utterly bored and disenchanted with their surroundings.

Meanwhile I am quietly perched in the back of the bar, quietly observing this very bizarre phenomenon.

Yes my dearest friends, I am referring to the Super Bowl. The one day each year when North Americans can justify a massive junk food binge whilst watching giant brutes running to and fro chasing a small rubbery brown ball.

Crass comments aside, it is my belief that the Super Bowl is merely an embodiment of consumerism and corporate greed. A dark and hollow characteristic that seemingly runs rampant throughout the Western world today.

It’s a known fact that the game generates a ton of money every year, but upon closer research I discovered the numbers were astronomical.

The Advertising

Nielsen records reveal that the televised broadcast is viewed by more than 100 million people across the globe every year, with advertisers eager to purchase airtime to plug their products.

To air a 30-second ad during the prestigious game, the cost starts at a cool $5 million according to superbowl-ads.com. And these ads have helped fill the coffers of multinational corporations that receive an immense boost from the lucrative event.

Photo courtesy of Creative Commons Finance Images

The Globe and Mail article revealed just how beneficial these marketing attempts can be, especially for the company GoDaddy. The web hosting company experienced an increase in market share ever since it started to air commercials at the prestigious sporting event. Although the ads cannot account completely for the entire increase in market share, GoDaddy’s presence has definitely seen a significant surge.  

To add fuel to the fire, data from statista.com reveals Super Bowl 50 will generate US$15.53 billion in terms of consumer related spending. This amount is more than three times greater than the amount of foreign aid Canada gave to states in 2014 according to the Canadian International Development Platform .

So essentially the focus is not even on the game itself, with the businessmen foaming at the mouth like rabid animals at the potential money to be made.

The Music

Let’s not forget about the halftime show, for capitalism trickles down into every facet of the Super Bowl. Whoever performs at the halftime is guaranteed to have success in terms of record sales and touring revenue.

After Bruno Mars’ performance in 2014, his album shifted 81,000 units in the week after his halftime show, according to Billboard. Madonna even marketed an entire album around her halftime routine, with her music video “Give Me All Your Luvin,’” featuring many football references in the lead up to the big show.

The best case though is Beyoncé’s show three years ago.

Yes we love queen Bey and she might very well be a deity, but her 2013 show had the dollars signs written all over it.

Contrary to past performers, Beyoncé at the time didn’t have a new album to promote but instead used the halftime slot to promote a new tour, which began two months after the Super Bowl in 2013. The Mrs. Carter World Tour went on to gross more than US$200 million and was one of the most successful tours of the decade according to idolator.com.

No doubt this year’s performers Coldplay will see the same trend for their upcoming tour.

In the end, few people really care about the actual football game. The Super Bowl merely highlights consumer exploitation and the fact that we live in a world that focuses on profits before people.

Capitalism is deeply rooted within our society and it’s a shame that we can no longer see that this event is just another excuse to extort money.

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